looking at the picture of you, walking along the beach, in a fluffy off-white polar bear fleece jacket, with your beautiful smile and sparkling eyes and hair that begs me to run my fingers through it....

i miss you

i look at this picture of you.....standing there at the edge of earth and sea and sky...and just like the earth, you hold the fire of your spirit within....you really are my world....all the elements, ,, complete and beautiful and natural.

i love you andre

just as the ocean is seperate from the land, yet they mingle...the sand swirling in the surf, the ocean permeating the shore...so are we my love....seperate, yet inextricably joined in an eternal rythym of love, pulsing as the waves on the beach behind you;...

at times soothing, calm.....and at others raging to be together....I miss you as the sand would miss the sea should it go away...and I will keep you as close as the surf holds the sand.....around me...within me....a part of each other for all of time..

I need you.

I am so lonely and alone here now...i dont fit in anymore...without the job....most of my friends are gone, and the ones who are cops grow ever more distant with the time that passes.....it is just as well, because to hear of it here is like a knife reopening a barely healed wound,,,,bringing the pain to well up again like a spring that wont be capped.....and i am alone here...

torn between past and future...trapped like a butterfly in the spider's sticky inescapable web.....thinking of freedom past, and wishing for beauty future.....and fearing the poison fangs of the present.....

so am i

alone

 except for you

just by existing you bring me hope...by your words you bring me joy.....and by your actions you bring me life beyond this terrible time.....

you do more for me than you think my darling beloved andre

with every breath you take, you sustain me, in love

Debra

"the song is from one of debra's favorite movies"